Have you ever heard the phrase “in order to love others, you must first love yourself?” I’m not sure who first coined this overused nugget of wisdom, but it has often left me frustrated. It’s like, ok, got it. First I have to love myself and then I can find a fulfilling relationship or fill in the blank. It’s not that I disagree with the message, but what has always been missing for me is the HOW.
It might sound funny to some people. Like, why do you have to try to love yourself? But for many, that’s the case. Not that they have to try, but they have gone through experiences and conditioning that hasn’t facilitated that type of nurturing relationship towards themselves, and in order to establish that, it does take effort. I am one of those people. I spent many years of my life not loving or taking care of myself. I sought validation from others which always left me unfulfilled and feeling the need to be who I thought others would accept. It wasn’t until I started turning the focal point from others to myself that things began to shift.
I once asked a therapist, “I know I need to love myself, but HOW do I do it?” Her answer was so spot on. She said, “the way to self-love is through consistent rituals of self-care.” Wow, yes! Small little acts of self-care are exactly what helped shift so much from the way I spoke to myself, to the way I prioritize my needs to my daily choices. Small acts of self-care were my way to self-love, and it could be yours too.
Here are a few small self-care rituals that I have engaged in over the years:
If self-love has been a challenge, or you notice the lack of it around your health, I’m here for you! Let’s talk about ways to improve your relationship with yourself and transform your health. Book your consultation call today.